Non Verbal Communication
When I moved back to the United States after living in Latin America for nearly 12 years, I had to redefine and renegotiate my whole concept of personal space. Latin America is a high-contact society and I was accustomed to working and living in that world. When people spoke to each other, they stood closer together. We touched more often. In fact, greetings did not occur without some sort of physical contact – a handshake in a more formal setting; a kiss on the cheek in more informal circumstances. Whether it was hello or good-bye, or even a simple introduction, a connection was made because of that physical contact. We used our hands when we talked to express ourselves, irrespective of class or gender.
I can only think of one person whom I encountered, who made a conscious effort not to use his hands when he spoke and that was former Chilean President Eduardo Frei. I interviewed Frei many times and I was always struck by how he sat with his hands clasped in front of him. All that would move were his thumbs! We decided he did this to distance himself from the stereotype of the agitated, overly expressive Latin American. (That’s just a thought – no documentation on this.)
Once away from Latin America and “back home” in the U.S., I had to take a giant step backwards whenever I engaged in conversation with anyone – literally and figuratively. If I stood too close, I got a clear sense of invading someone’s personal space. And heaven forbid there should be any touching when an introduction was made. No handshake and definitely no kiss on the cheek. I felt – and still do feel lost – without that physical gesture that goes accompanies saying “nice to meet you.”
On a trip to Korea a few years ago, I encountered another type of non verbal communication in professional encounters concerning the exchange of business cards. In the U.S., we don’t pay much attention to the swap – we get a card and may not even look at it, before putting it in our pocket. That is an insult in Korea – where it is customary to carefully study both sides of the card before putting it away in a wallet or some other designated holder – never in your pocket.
After reading this chapter and reflecting on some of the different ways we communicate nonverbally, thoughts of world leaders and how they say what they wish to say without uttering a word came to mind. Dress is important. Mahatma Gandhi was a leader of symbolic communication through his choice of attire. The father of Indian independence and nonviolent protest adopted the draped dhoti of India, as his standard garb. In so doing, Gandhi succeeded in aligning himself with India’s poorest people. To be a bit more current, think of the fatigues always worn by Cuban President Fidel Castro or the striped sweater, or “chompa” worn by Bolivian President Evo Morales on his first state visit to Europe last year instead of a suit and tie. His “fashion statement” made headlines around the world.
Perhaps the saying is true that you can’t judge a book by its cover, but the cover can say a lot.
Note: I obtained the information about Gandhi from Kishan Rana’s writings from this website: textus.diplomacy.edu. I followed the controversy about Morales’ attire after he was elected to office last year. And Fidel, when he wore something other than fatigues, that was news.
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